I had an honest conversation with God today. I mean I was respectful but honest. I told Him how I felt and pleaded for His help. I told Him that I needed Him every second of every day. I cried out that I am in pain and don't know what to do. And when all was said and done I sat quietly and waited to hear from Him. And He did.....He reminded me how He has never left me for one second and has counted every tear that I have shed. He said what I think He already sent others to say....."Be still...and know I am God". Easier said than done if I am honest. It's hard because I want so badly to make sense of all of this and move foward with a purpose that will honor my son and give God the glory.
So that is what I am working on at this moment - being still. Please keep me in your prayers because I am struggling.